What I Have Learned

One hope that I have for working with children and families who come from diverse backgrounds is that no matter who enters my classroom environment, that they feel welcomed and valued by both myself and the rest of my classroom community.

One goal that I would like to set for the early childhood field in general related to diversity, equity, and social justice is that all children receive the opportunity to develop a positive sense of self and a healthy identity.

I would like to thank my colleagues for joining me on this journey. It has been eye opening and beneficial to my future classrooms of students. I hope that you all have experienced some growth as well, and I hope to continue our relationships into future courses and into the future. Good luck everyone!

Collage Representative of my Learning

Children need freedom to explore and try out things new to them. Whether it be dress up, sports, or family activities. children need to be able to express their curiosities about gender, religion, race, ethnicities, and so many other topics so that they can learn and grow and discover how they fit into our ever changing society.

 

Being Ssshhed

            This week we were supposed to talk about a time we witnessed an adult silence a child, or silenced them ourselves, for pointing out someone's differences. The best situation I can remember was when I was a child myself. We were at the zoo or somewhere you had to walk a lot and I was tired. I saw a woman in a wheelchair and commented that she was lucky because she could sit everywhere she went. My mother shushed me and said don't talk like that.

            Receiving this message opposed the image I had been building regarding diversely abled people. See my older sister has disabilities, and she looks a little different. We learned sign language so we could communicate with her more effectively, but she was capable to do just about everything else. Then suddenly my mother is telling me not to talk about people that look visibly different than myself. My mother's response confused me and really bothered me for some time afterwards, I remember thinking about it multiple times growing up.

            According to our course media, it is important to intervene when incidents happen as well as being proactive (Laureate, Race). My mother should have talked to me about what I said and how it could be perceived by others. She could have helped me to understand that the woman is not relaxing in her chair, she is working with her arms. If we were in a classroom, a teacher may respond to a child saying this by introducing a game or discussion in which images are used of diversely abled people doing positive, and active, things (Laureate, Race). Another option in the classroom, as well as at home, would be to use puppets for children to express themselves through a third party (Laureate, Physical). Children's literature could also be used to broaden children's understandings, but be wary of stereotypes within the books as well as among the books you chose (Laureate, Physical). 

Children's Exposure to LGBT

                This week I explored how children are being introduced to homophobia and heterosexism, mostly through children's books. From my short research I have found that these issues are approached typically in one of two ways; either embraced entirely or ignored completely. What I mean by this is that teachers are either talking to their students about these issues and challenging their beliefs or they are redirecting their comments or replacing what they said with more acceptable words. Two books that I have seen used frequently are "It's a George Thing" by David Bedford as well as "And Tango Makes Three" by Peter Parnell. Bedford's book approaches gender roles by showing that boys can enjoy music and dance just like girls can. Parnell's book approaches alternative family structures and how a family can have two Dads.

            Some centers feel that including books that depict gay or lesbian individuals and families are inappropriate and avoid their inclusion. My view on this topic is very similar to one of the teachers in our video this week, "Her role was to help all children develop a positive identity, regardless of personal belief" (Laureate, 2010). Even those children who do not have LGBT family members should be educated equally so that all children are prepared to be respectful when they eventually come into contact with a gay or lesbian adult or schoolmate (Laureate, 2010).

            The last question this week is about what I would do if a parent informed me that they did not want a gay or lesbian educator to be interacting with their child. I would have to explain to this parent that all are welcome in my center and that sexual orientation or preference does not influence a teacher's effectiveness.

References:

Laureate Education, Inc. (Producer). (2009). Start seeing diversity: Gender. Baltimore, MD: Author. 

Adjourning

Are high-performing groups hardest to leave?

            I think that high performing groups are among the hardest to leave because you have experienced great success as a member of that group. You would probably be fearful to move on and have to face less success or even failure.

Groups with the clearest established norms?

            Norms for a group are things like habits, rituals, expectations, accommodations, language, dress, style of communication. These things can create a type of security blanket or give the feeling of comfort and home. To leave these things behind is hard because new groups may, and likely do, have different norms.

Which of the groups that you participated in was hardest to leave? Why?

            The hardest group to leave was my 6th grade soccer team. Our team was still co-ed but I believe this was our last or second to last year for this. My dad was our coach and he drove my best friend and I. I think our team was extra close for a few reasons. We always had practice whereas most other teams played and practice only with good weather. Sprinkle or rain with no lighting meant we practiced on the field as normal. If the weather turned worse we would move inside for a modified practice. We went for pizza as a team quite a few times throughout the season and we always carpooled to games. We had a two middle schools in my school district growing up and my whole team was in one school, actually in only two classes. I think this added to our closeness and lengthened our friendships built during the season throughout the rest of the school year.

What sorts of closing rituals have you experienced or wish you had experienced?

            The closing ritual for my 6th grade soccer team was very special to me. We had pizza and cake at my house the Saturday after the last game. We played at my house for hours; trampoline, I think my promiscuous cat had just had kittens, and I remember playing hide & seek outside in the dark (long after the party should have ended). I think this gave us all closure and fond memories.

How do you imagine that you will adjourn from the group of colleagues you have formed while working on your master's degree in this program?

            I hope that when we adjourn from this group of colleagues that I am able to provide them encouragement towards their future endeavors. Through the discussions and this blog I have learned a great deal from my colleagues about their perspectives on issues so that I can understand those topics more holistically and also what they may gleam from resources that I have not. This group has been very supportive of my learning and encouraging me to continue trying my best.

Why is adjourning an essential stage of teamwork?

            Adjourning is essential because it gives individuals the chance to evaluate the events that have occurred, capture lessons learned, and evaluate how you have grown or changed (Abudi, 2010).

Resources:

Abudi, G. (2010). The five stages of team development: A case study. Retrieved from http://www.projectsmart.co.uk/the-five-stages-of-team-development-a-case-study.html

Conflict Resolution, hopefully

                 I live with my step-mom and my aunt, who both smoke. They smoke outside and in the car sometimes. My problem is that they smoke right outside the sliding door, which is the only path for my one-year old daughter to get to the backyard, and they are almost constantly out there. They take up the only patio furniture and they leave the butts and all their other accessories on the low table so my daughter can never be in that area. If they are watching her they may hold the cigarette in one hand and help her with the other, and that is just way too close for comfort to being burned and exposed to secondhand smoke. They also will smoke outside the car if the baby or I go with them somewhere, but they will leave the car door or windows open so we can socialize while we all get cancer.

            As you can tell, this topic still frustrates me. I do everything I can to keep my daughter safe and as healthy as she can be and I feel like it is thrown in my face by exposing us both to these horrible chemicals. They are both educated adults so it just doesn't make sense to me. But to help with this conflict there are two approaches I could take; Non Violent Communication and the Third Side.

            Using NVC I could honestly express myself without attacking my family. The fourth skill in NVC states, "requesting what we would like in a way that clearly and specifically states what we want" (www.cnvc.org). I could hope that by communicating my needs clearly, without tension, and specifically that my family would listen and do their best to meet those needs.

            Another approach, that I think is much more likely to be successful, puts most of the responsibility on my understanding their perspective. If I use 3S to understanding their side of the argument I could come to the realization that they are not out there smoking all the time and that we could go play somewhere else for the few minutes they take to smoke a cigarette. I could also be understanding that they want to continue talking to us when they stop to smoke in the car. We could get out of the car and stand out of the smoke range to talk with them.

            If anyone else has any further input and advice on this situation I would appreciate it. I enjoy my family's company but the safety of my baby girl comes first.

Communication Assessments

            This week I asked my stepmom and my husband to fill out the three communications assessments about myself. The most surprising aspect I found was that my husband evaluated my verbal aggressiveness as 'significant'. I was under the impression that we had successful communications and that we talked things out very well. I was surprised to find that I made him feel attacked or put down when we discussed certain topics. He clarified that he does not always feel this way but if there is a point that I really want to make that I will make it despite his feelings. I was very saddened by this and I am determined to not let anger or meanness find its way into our communications anymore.

           I also learned that I still have a high level of social anxiety that I had thought was more under control. I fear that this might negatively affect social life as well as my professional work in regards to my relationships with coworkers. Also any time that I may need to speak in meetings or conferences this may become an issue.

            One other aspect about my communication skills that I learned this week is that I have a people-oriented listening style. I think that this could either help or hurt, depending on the context, because of the level of empathy involved in this style. I think that it could help in that it can help me listen closely and truly to children, coworkers, and families. However, it may negatively affect me because empathy may affect proper judgment of a situation.